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Watch the researchers present their poster

Aim or purpose

We aimed to explore how counselling, combined with a 12 Step Programme, impacted on healing the shame carried by clients who are self-identified sex-addicts, and if this improved clients’ ability to form intimate relationships. Our purpose is to highlight the issues arising and the remedial process experienced by those in this client-group.

Design and methodology

Initial research inquiry/our literature searches indicated that shame is a characteristic common to most sex-addicts and that addiction itself inhibits relational-intimacy. Two independent research groups have collaborated on their findings after interviewing seven respondents. Guided by Íø±¬ÃÅ ethical principles for research in counselling/psychotherapy (Mitchels, 2018), respondents were audio-recorded during semi-structured interviews. The resulting data was thematically analysed informed by phenomenological principles (McLeod, 2003).

Ethical approval

Our College Ethics Board granted approval and all respondents were offered six no-fee counselling sessions subsequent to their research participation, if required.

Results and findings

Respondents disclosed childhood trauma/abuse (commonly sexual) apparently carried into adulthood in the form of toxic-shame and compulsively ‘acted-out’ sexually. This deepened respondents’ existing sense of humiliation, fear of rejection/judgment, powerlessness and worthlessness. This low self-esteem also fuelled a search for external-validation though multiple sexual encounters with frequent disregard for sexual/personal health/safety. Respondents reported an inability to form/sustain intimate relationships/experience love during their active sex-addiction and co-morbidity, addiction to food/eating-disorders alcohol/drug-misuse, was always also present. Respondents felt both counselling and the 12 Step Programme were vital to their recovery. Counselling appeared to help respondents process trauma, toxic-shame, deep-rooted emotions and link early life experiences to the development of their sex-addiction/substance-misuse; whilst the 12 Step Programme was relied upon for daily living-support, developing intimacy/relationships and sustaining abstinence from addictive sexual behaviour.

Research limitations

The small scale of the research may inhibit generalisation of our findings, which may also be subjective to the experiences of our respondents.

Conclusions and implication

Given our findings it seems reasonable to suggest that practitioners might be advised to encourage sex-addicted clients’ participation in a 12 Step Programme; in order to support their ongoing recovery, development of relational-intimacy and different self-defined appropriate sexual behaviour. However, it also appears evident that psychotherapy/counselling is invaluable in helping clients to process their toxic-shame and build self-esteem.